Protect Yourself From Cheaters
Hello MetaZooheads, your favorite caster, Douglas “DiRTy” Haas, back again with another piece of practical particulars. Been a while since we’ve spoken. I have had my hands full lately with not only my fatherly duties but also, I have been practicing and participating in MetaZoo tournaments across the state of Texas, and even found my way to Denver. Today I want to talk to you about something that is always something you need to be aware of, and that is sometimes difficult to spot, cheaters. It’s not always easy to be sure of a cheater, and you never want to accuse someone of cheating who isn’t. I will try to break things down the way I always do, in a manner that is rememberable and ease to apply. No matter how smart you think you are, Cheaters will always try to be one step ahead of you. Hopefully, I can give you some advice that you can use to protect yourself. I will start by naming these cheaters and then give you ways you can catch and defend against these people trying to take the glory you so rightly deserve. So, let’s get started.
Probably better labeled the snake, the shark is a hard cheater to spot, as all good cheaters are. They will attempt to use the rules in a manner not intended to put you in the position to get a penalty. You can catch these cheaters often calling a judge for any minor rule infraction and demanding a punishment. This is a form of soft cheating if there is such a thing, where it is hard to call your opponent a cheater for the action they have chosen to take, but at the same time, losing because of getting a ruling violation due to your opponents unclear or intentional actions is definitely a lose that feels undeserved. One example of this would be your opponent saying, ” I think I am going to end my turn, waiting for you to draw a card, ” then calling a judge and claiming that you drew a card before they had ended their turn. These are the same type of people that will call a judge after you take 10 seconds before making a play claiming you’re slow playing. We will talk about slow play in a minute, but obviously, this isn’t it. The only real way to defend yourself against a cheater like this is to make sure you are knowledgeable on all the rules and making sure that every action you take is clear and concise. Another good way to defend against this is to keep detailed notes of your match as you play. Trying to argue something that happened the turn before, even a small life point difference, is much easier if you have written proof and not just some number on a calculator. Be cognizant of the actions your opponent is taking and be aware of the fact that people will attempt things like this.
The next entry on our list is probably one of the most dangerous. The Magician is someone who is very good at the techniques commonly used by magicians and card mechanics to manipulate cards in the deck to be advantageous for themselves. They will use distraction to make you look left when you should be looking right. They will stack cards in their deck and yours to ensure the outcome of draws. I’ve even seen very high caliber cheaters of this nature able to draw multiple cards at once or draw cards from the middle of the deck without so much as a clear movement from the rest of the deck. These cheaters will even switch facedown cards with cards in their hands, this is not as prevalent in MetaZoo, but since traps are getting more and more synergies, this is something that we may have to be on the lookout for in the future. These cheaters will even use gimmicked items to manipulate the game. Something such as miscut sleeves or weighted dice are common things that will be used by cheaters to gain an advantage. Another common tactic of magicians is to use a plant, someone who provides them with the information they need to perform the trick. This is definitely something to be on the lookout for. People standing behind you that you don’t know, people talking to your opponent during your game, things like this can easily signal to your opponent. So how do you protect yourself against a cheater of this particular persuasion? That is difficult to answer. First and foremost, stay diligent, do not get distracted by things outside the game, and always watch your opponent when they handle cards or make movements toward the board. Don’t allow them to take their cards out of view, and if you ever feel like there is something that doesn’t feel quite right, it is up to you to call a judge. The bigger the events and, ultimately, the prizes get, the higher the likelihood that someone will try to take advantage of a situation to gain an advantage. Simply palming cards or hiding powerful cards out of sight is enough to win the game should they be able to get them to their hand. In the end, it is a game, and it is meant to be fun, but as with all aspects of life, money brings out the worst in people sometimes.
The last cheater we will be talking about today is the one that gets on my nerves the most. It is not the most dangerous cheater, but it is a cheater nonetheless. The slowplayer will take extremely long amounts of time to make a move in situations where there are not very many decisions that could be made. They will intentionally draw a game closer and closer to time, and they do this with the intention of winning the game in time or forcing the game to a draw. Sometimes their intent is just to frustrate their opponent into making bad plays, as the more upset you get, the lower your IQ goes; this is a proven scientific fact. Once again, to defend yourself against this type of thing, it is your job to call a judge and report the behavior. You’d rather call a judge and be wrong than not call a judge and be right.
Well, that is that. Cheating is a horrible thing that takes the fun out of a game and discredits all legitimate players who love and enjoy the game. As a community, we can not stand for it, and we must root it out wherever we find it. See something, say something, that’s my motto. Make sure if you are watching someone else’s game and see something fishy that, you go and grab a judge and discuss what you saw. I know this is not a fun subject to discuss and is something we would rather didn’t happen, but the hard reality is that it does. Protect yourself, protect your fellow casters, and above all, remember, it’s just a game! Until next time friends, this is DiRTy signing off! Tune in next time when we talk more about competitive MetaZoo and attempt to help you take your game to the next level. Love you guys!!!